On Thursdays we take you to “the well” - your source for inspiration and how-to’s.

I believe that the most powerful lesson in life is learning to trust the one person you truly spend the most time with – yourself! After spending a good deal of time and effort learning to trust myself, I can tell you that the payoff is greater than I could ever have imagined. And in the hopes of inspiring readers to learn to trust themselves, I’d like to share my process with you.

Growing up, I always went to others for guidance: I looked to my older sister for advice, I turned to my parents for every major (and not-so-major) decision, and I always tried my best to please everyone around me. Eventually, I realized that I was trying to make everyone else happy, yet I never thought to consider how happy I was, and I knew it was time for me to start taking care of myself, respecting myself, and making my own decisions.

Not knowing where to start, I just began asking myself some questions: “How do I trust myself? How do I feel? What am I afraid of? What do I really want? How do I want to feel? What kind of life do I want? What are my values?” It was a good start, but I discovered that I was asking all these important questions yet I wasn’t able to answer a single one.

I quickly adjusted my approach and found a breakthrough by adding two simple words to all of my questions: “right now.” “What do I want, right now? How am I feeling, right now? What is best for me, right now? What do I love about my life, right now? What makes me happy, right now?” This was the trigger I needed to answer all of these great questions. And it was just what I needed to learn how to trust myself.

It’s been amazing to see the transformation in myself just by answering these questions. And although I continue to consult with my loved ones, I no longer look to them for my answers. I now look within myself and trust my own answers. And I hope that you will trust yourself too.

~Melissa Risdon

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